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The Private Life of the Cat Who..., by Lilian Jackson Braun

The Private Life of the Cat Who..., by Lilian Jackson Braun



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The Private Life of the Cat Who..., by Lilian Jackson Braun

Koko is a remarkable male Siamese who happens to have sixty whiskers instead of the usual forty-eight. Yum Yum is an adorable female who will steal anything-including hearts. James Qwilleran is a columnist for The Moose County Something who had recorded his cats' exploits in his personal journal since the day each arrived in his life. And Lilian Jackson Braun is the beloved creator of them all! This delightful collection of feline antics will warm the hearts of cat lovers everywhere.

  • Sales Rank: #693802 in Books
  • Brand: G.P. Putnam's Sons
  • Published on: 2003-10-27
  • Released on: 2003-10-27
  • Original language: English
  • Number of items: 1
  • Dimensions: 7.54" h x .75" w x 5.20" l,
  • Binding: Hardcover
  • 144 pages
Features
  • Great product!

Review
"Braun reigns supreme as the queen of the cat cozies."—Publishers Weekly

"A master of mystery."—People

"The feelings produced by reading about Qwill and his pals can best be compared to that coziest of feelings—having a purring cat on your lap."—Booklist

About the Author
Lilian Jackson Braun is the author of twenty-five Cat Who... novels and three short-story collections.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
Chapter One

enter: kao k'o kung, howling

I'll never forget those days! I was getting my life back on track. I had a job, writing features for the Daily Fluxion. I had a place to live, an apartment on the ground floor of an old mansion. And soon I would be getting a roommate!

My landlord, who was art critic for the Fluxion, lived upstairs with his art treasures and a Siamese called Kao K'o Kung. Although I knew nothing about cats, I was enlisted for cat-sitting when the critic was out of town.

He wrote his reviews at home and never went near the news office. According to conventional wisdom, he never went near the art galleries either, but wrote his nasty criticism off the top of his head. Among local artists he was well hated, to coin a phrase. So no one was surprised when he was murdered in his own backyard.

That was the first time I heard the cat's "death howl," a bloodcurdling experience!

Kao K'o Kung-that smart cat!-then walked downstairs and moved in with me. I recall giving him some turkey from the Press Club that I had been saving for myself.

So here we were! Thrown together by fate! First thing I did, I changed his name to Koko.

He made no objection. He knew which side his bread was buttered on! In the days that followed we invented games to play, both athletic and intellectual. I was at work all day but made up for it by reading to him every evening-either the Daily Fluxion or the dictionary; he was not particular.

Then I began to find fault with the old mansion. It seemed to be the ancestral domain of a dynasty of moths, which were eating holes in my bathrobe and neckties. But where could I move? Apartments in my price range specified "no pets allowed." I discussed the problem with Koko, who listened thoughtfully. I told him that a friend of mine was going to Europe for three months and had suggested that I house-sit. Koko squeezed his eyes. We were getting to be pals. Then, to my surprise, he turned out be a self-appointed bodyguard and somewhat of a bloodhound!

One day he wanted to go upstairs to his old haunt. The murdered man's treasures had been removed, but I had a key to the apartment and the supply of cat litter. But that cat seemed to have his own urgent reason; he ran up and down the stairs ahead of me in anticipation.

Sure enough, there was a large tapestry still hanging in a hallway, and Koko was determined to paw his way behind it. When I went to his assistance, I discovered a door back there, which the landlord had found it advisable to conceal. It led downstairs to a small ground-floor apartment in the rear of the building, and it was filled with clues to the recent crime. It had been used as an artist's studio and still had an odor of turpentine.

Just as I was snooping around in amazement and Koko was getting some kind of early high from the paintbrushes, I heard a key turn in the rear door leading to the backyard, and a big man walked in. For a moment we were both frozen in surprise. Then he looked about wildly, grabbed a palette knife, and came at me!

Before I could find a chair to swing at him, Koko threw a catfit! The room seemed filled with snarling animals, attacking him from all sides with claws extended! I was able to clobber the guy, and we left him on the floor while we called the police. Koko spent the next few hours licking

his claws.

* * *

I was glad to move into my friend's posh apartment on the fifteenth floor of the Villa Verandah. Koko seemed happy, too. I think he liked the view. Then one day I came home from work and found a large hole in the green wool upholstery of a fine wing chair. As I examined it, with horror, Koko jumped onto the chair seat and upchucked a green fur ball-still moist!

I immediately phoned the Press Club bartender, who always had the answer to all questions.

He listened and said wisely, "Sounds like an emotional problem. You need a psycatatrist. I can tell you where to find one."

It sounded like a hoax, especially since the address he gave me was on the edge of the red-light district. And I was even more suspicious when I phoned for an appointment and was told to come alone without the cat ... but I was desperate! I reported for the consultation.

It was a tawdry house, but there were cats on every windowsill, and that was promising. I was welcomed by a kindly woman in a faded housedress accompanied by at least a dozen cats who seemed quite well adjusted. She ushered me into the parlor and gave me a cup of tea with the inevitable cat hair floating in it. No matter.

What I learned, after stating the problem, was this: Siamese, when troubled, become wool eaters. My ties and bathrobe were undoubtedly wool. Koko was lonely because he was accustomed to having someone at home all day. He needed a nice little Siamese female for a companion. Neutering would make no difference. They would be quite sweet to each other.... I found this concept extremely interesting.

Now all I had to do was find a little female Siamese....

Panic time! Here I was-a lifelong cat illiterate-involved in matchmaking between temperamental Siamese! I phoned the Press Club bartender for advice once more.

"Call the catteries listed in the Yellow Pages," he said with authority. "Check the classified ads in the paper. Call the pet hospitals!"

I did. My efforts turned up only one available candidate, and the asking price was more than my weekly paycheck at the Fluxion. I was just getting back on my feet financially. I needed to make a down payment on a used car.

Meanwhile I was afraid to leave Koko alone in the borrowed apartment; he might start eating the rugs! Once, as a test, I shut him up in the bathroom, and he howled so continuously and with such volume that there were five complaints to the manager.

Someone suggested selling Koko; it would solve the whole problem.

I considered that unthinkable. Already I felt a kinship with him that was hard to explain.

I'll never forget the frantic search for a companion who would stop Koko from eating wool!

Most helpful customer reviews

68 of 70 people found the following review helpful.
Blank Pages and Redundant Material
By Avid Reader
I received this book as a gift, and I am so glad I did not buy it. It is a 137 page book, of which over 50 pages (FIFTY PAGES) are blank, or have bad line-art of a siamese cat. The remaining pages are large type, double spaced, half of which are just rehashes of previous books. I figure there are probably 30 pages of original material. It's obvious that Ms. Braun (or the publishers using a ghostwriter) are just trying to milk the fan base for more money. Avoid this book, even if you are a Cat Who completist.

49 of 50 people found the following review helpful.
A Rare Foul Ball from Mrs. Braun
By Dennis Phillips
Being a great fan of Koko and Yum Yum I was absolutely delighted when I saw this book. I figured that this would be a compendium of cute cat stories that were never mentioned in the actual mystery series but alas, I was wrong. Most all of the anecdotes related in this book come directly from the pages of previously published books and what little new material there is, is not very well thought out or written. I really can't imagine that Mrs. Braun actually wrote this book because it is really not up to her talent level.

Worse yet, several of the little stories give away the ending of the other books and if I had not already read most of the ones mentioned I would be quite upset. The worst thing about this book is that the idea behind it had so much promise. The lives of these two lovable cats are obviously not completely covered in the series proper for there are times when James Qwilleran, the cat's human companion, is not solving mysteries. A look at what these two felines are up to during these down times would be great fun and with a little effort and imagination this could have been a delightful book. Unfortunately, there appears to have been far to little effort and absolutely no imagination applied to this project and whoever came up with this mess should be ashamed of themselves.

The only redeeming qualities of this book are the adorable picture of the two Siamese cats on the back cover and the frequent references to T.S. Eliot's cat Rum Tum Tugger. A little class never hurts.

63 of 67 people found the following review helpful.
Cat Who Series Revisited
By Laura A. Day
I would hate for anyone to read this book and base their judgement of Braun's wonderful series of mysteries on it. This is a cute little "gift" book for dear friends who love their cats more than anything else, and who like reading about the personalities of cats. For those of us who have read and loved the "Cat Who..." series I am afraid this book does not hold much draw.

See all 76 customer reviews...

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